I have been through 2 weeks of Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University and so far I am loving it. All of it! We already have our Baby Step One completed (started our emergency fund). This past Sunday we talked more about relationships and how money or finances influence those. Mike and I relate to money differently. I am a nerd and he is a free spirit (if you know FPU, you understand!) and I have learned from the class how to manage our situation better.
We also talked about kids and money. I want my kids to grow to be happy and healthy people. Part of that is to have a handle on their money… to know how to use it, not get into debt, and be able to save for the things they want. Dave Ramsey says that kids should do chores for money. This is something we have stayed away from for several reasons. One main reason is that it is hard to pay for doing chores when you don’t have the money (sidenote: if the ex paid child support that was appropriate, this would be less an issue). The other reason is that we have felt that chores were done because you are part of this family. I don’t even have the kids doing difficult chores and, if they just get them done, they take less than 10 minutes a day.
Well FPU teaches that you need to pay kids for their chores to teach them that working will earn commissions (or wages) and that we need to teach this responsibility to kids early. He also said that by buying the kids the things they want, even if it isn’t right away because we can’t or don’t have the funds, is not teaching them that they need to work for things. I have been thinking more about this since I came home last night and I do agree, somewhat. I can’t afford to pay 4 kids for 5 chores a week. That will be $80 a week and we can’t do it. I have been so frustrated lately though because the kids have been really slacking on getting their chores done. So, maybe an incentive, or the promise of commissions, would help this. I like the idea that you pay them if they do the job and they get nothing if they don’t.
I am willing to look into this more with a bit of a twist. I think I want to start low on the pay scale. I will start the kids at 25 cents per chore and if they consistently do their chores, and do a good job at them, I will give them a “raise”. I will set clear expectations what we want them to do. In addition, I told Mike that I want to also include another part of Dave Ramsey’s plan which includes having the kids start a 3 envelope system. One envelope will be for saving, one for spending, and one for giving. I remember, as a child, having a missions milk carton and saving my change for the missions. I want my kids to know how fortunate they are and be thankful for the things they are given… and to give back to others.
For the record, Tayler has her own set of chores and I am not really eager to pay her to do any. Sadly, she won’t care about a piddly wage for doing things and again, we can’t afford otherwise. I know what Dave Ramsey says but I am not sure it is going to work for us right now for her. But, I am thinking about setting up a bank account for Tayler and helping her to learn to save some. Now, she babysits each week and spends all she makes. She went with me to the FPU class last night and I think she understands the need to save now so NOW is the time to do it!
So, my question to you all is this: What do you think are appropriate chores for a 3, 8, and 9 year old? I know that Johnny (3yo) will have less difficult chores but I do think he needs them as well. Please share with me some suggestions… but please don’t say laundry because that won’t happen. I am a bit too attached to my washer and dryer.
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
We recently started a behavior jar for our 5 and 2 year old. They get to put a pom pom in the jar each time they do something we have asked them to do. For example if they pick up their room when asked, they get to put one pom pom in. When their jar is full they get to cash in their pom poms for whatever prize they decided upon in the beginning. My daughter wants a trip to Chuck-E-Cheese to be her prize.
http://www.lifedownourlane.com/2010/02/1-trip-to-hobby-lobby.html
Some variation of this may work for your kiddos. Give them a token of some kind and when it reaches a certain point they get the reward.
[Reply]
Stefany Reply:
March 1st, 2010 at 9:44 pm
Thanks for the idea Lacie! Sadly, because of their mother’s negative influence, I am not sure this will work for the 8 and 9 year old but it is worth a try for sure. It might be better than the money because at least this way we can afford it easier.
The one thing is that I still need to have a clear set of chores they need to do. I can promise you they will not do anything if it isn’t laid out ahead of time.
[Reply]
This is the first post I’ve seen of your blog… so not sure my thoughts will be appropriate for your kids (but rest assured… I’ll be reading more… ).
Chores for 3 YO: folding his own and perhaps something like towels, picking up his roon.
8 & 9 YO: close enough in age that their type of chores can probably be the same type… washing & putting away dishes (or loading/unloading dishwasher). Picking up their room. Folding their own clothes and putting them away. Folding sheets. Stocking the bathrooms with toilet paper (if you keep the TP elsewhere… like we do).
Something like the TP is an on-going thing… no set day that it has to be done, so no payment PER event… just a weekly payment.
I’m struggling with some of this myself. Our 13YO makes some money outside of the house (she refs soccer games) and the 11YO so wants her own money too. They both have chores that they are required to do as being members of the family/household. So how do we add extra ‘chores’ so the 11YO can get paid? One way she gets paid is that the 13YO has a chore that she fails to do quite often (take the trash to the curb on trash day). The 13YO leaves for school before rest of us do. So there is many times that the trash isn’t down to the curb when 11YO is ready to go to school. If she takes trash to curb then 13YO has to pay her for doing her (13YO) job. We had hoped that would be the incentive for the 13YO to DO her chore… because if she doesn’t .. then 13YO has to pay 11YO to do it for her. It works about 1/2 the time. We are still struggling with what to have 11YO do that is an extra chore that is a consistant income for her.
HTH… and I’ll be back to read more when I have a few extra minutes.
3, 8, and 9 year old
[Reply]
Stefany Reply:
March 1st, 2010 at 10:17 pm
We are kind of in the same place. Dave Ramsey says that some chores, not all, should be paid on commission. He says that some things should be done “just because you are part of this family”. Well, that means I need to find new or different chores.
Thanks for the ideas. Some of those they already do but there are some new ideas.
[Reply]
you’re a Dave Ramsey fan TOO?!? goodness I like you more and more every day!!
I taught his class last year at a high school. The kids gobbled it up!
Empty/fill the dishwasher
)
put away clean clothes
take out trash (like the little cans in the bathroom and bedrooms)
put away leftovers
organize fridge
help you grocery shopping (?)
cleaning toilet/bathtub etc (be careful of the cleaners, though- I use to get horrible migraines from the fumes- can be very toxic!)
vacuum (move furniture while you vacuum)
sweep/mop floor
clean out car
wash car
mow/scoop snow (not sure where you live)
sort laundry (doesn’t involve touching the machine
wash/dry dishes
that’s all I can think of for now!
[Reply]
Stefany Reply:
March 1st, 2010 at 10:18 pm
Thanks Kim! My problem is finding additional chores from what they kids already do so they can do their commission chores and the “just because” chores. There are a few new ideas here so I appreciate your input!
[Reply]
Hmmm. Good question. I’ve never really given much in the way of money for chores, mainly because I don’t keep a lot of cash on hand (and kids don’t usually take checks!). But on the other hand, if you don’t do the chores you are assigned, you get penalty chores as a consequence. As for chores, my kids at that age were doing all the trash, unloading the dishwasher, setting the table, and doing some of the sweeping & mopping, and yes, doing their own laundry. If you want them to be successful at doing their laundry when they get older, this is a good time to let them start, even if they only do part of the process, like starting the washer, sorting the clothes, or putting the clothes into the dryer.
[Reply]
Stefany Reply:
March 1st, 2010 at 10:21 pm
They do sort their clothes but I want them far away from my machines at this point. The penalty chores concept has not worked here… at all. I am willing to give this FPU plan a chance. I do like Lacie’s idea (above) about not doing money and instead doing a reward at the end. That would cause a problem with my “give” envelope but I still think this might be easier on us for right now.
[Reply]
I just finished FPU in October, and it is already changing my life. Stick with it- it is amazing! And my husband and I are opposite you guys- he’s the nerd and I’m the free spirit. But it is nice to finally know how to work together.
My oldest is two, so I’m no help with chores, but I’ll come back for advice in a few months!
I’m following now too!
[Reply]
For the 3yo I’d do clearing the kitchen table, putting the dishes in the sink. Even if it isn’t perfect you can ask the 3yo to make the bed in the morning.
The 8 & 9 yr old are ready for more difficult tasks. Again, if you aren’t looking for perfection vacuming the floor, sweeping, mopping, dusting. Do you have pets? Perhaps feeding the pets?
When I was 12 and my siblings were 8, 7, 6, and 2 years old my mom would split the house into sections. Since i was older I got an entire room (and she would rotate the rooms each week) and my other siblings shared room chores. If I had the kitchen that week I had to sweep, mop and wipe down counters. If I had bathroom that week I did it all. The others shared a room so if they had living room that week one kid did toys, the other vacummed, and the other picked up trash and the other clothes.
I see you are getting some good ideas! Keep us posted on what you decide to do
[Reply]
We started FPU(then we moved and had babies), but haven’t gone back to finish it. I like the concept, right now we do not pay our son (3) an allowance, but if he doesn’t do task that is given to him he losses privledges.
He is responsible for picking up the toys in the family room and putting them back in the appropriate baskets
He also assists with emptying the dishwasher and putting away the kid cups, plates and silverware.
He helps to set the table and clean up after eating.
Finally, he is responsible for picking out his own clothes everyday.
Best of luck, I don’t have any suggestions for the older ones, I’m not there yet.
[Reply]