I’m not sure when it happened, but my teenager has turned into a… teenager. This may sound stupid, but the truth is that I am upset by the change. She used to care about someone other than herself. She actually admitted to me that she only thought about what she wanted today and not about anyone else. She also admitted that she doesn’t ever want to be home. She used to want to spend time with her little brother and sister (at least the littlest two). She used to be more willing to talk and spend time with the family.
Now, all she wants to do is be gone from the house. If she is home, she is in her room on the phone. She wants nothing to do with me or anyone else. She says it isn’t about me but it is. I am affected by everything that happens in this house. I am the one that has to tell Johnny that she is leaving (again) and that I don’t know when she will be back. I am the one that gets the pleasure of seeing her for only 20 minutes during dinner… only for her to disappear shortly after wards. It seems she wants nothing to do with me at all.
I know that all teens go through this but I wasn’t ready and do not like it. She doesn’t want to have her friends here because of our house… it is chaotic and loud as you would expect with so many kids. That hurts though. She used to be willing to bring people here… now I don’t see her. She has wanted to leave 3 out of the past 4 nights. On the one night she didn’t ask to leave, she was in her room sleeping all night.
I hate that my relationship with her is slipping away and there seems to be nothing I can do about it. If I keep her home, she is angry and wants nothing to do with me. If I let her go, she is happy and I lose another chance to talk and hang out with her. This is a lose-lose situation if you ask me.
*sigh* Lucky me… I have 4 more kids that will reject me some day.
(for some clarification, check out this newer post)